breaking up is hard to do

Saying goodbye to someone you love is never easy or fun. In fact, regardless of the circumstances, I think it's probably one of the most dreaded activities that we do. We hate it. It makes us sad. It hurts. It hurts even if you know it's coming. Even if your goodbye means a new, wonderful beginning for the other person. Even if you're saying goodbye to a friend who's moving away to go "back home." Even if you're saying goodbye to a family member who's gotten his dream job in another state. Even if you're sending your grown-up baby off to the university you've hoped and prayed she would attend. Even if you're sending your child to experience a life-changing semester in Europe. Even if you're saying goodbye to a loved minister who has been called to another place. Even if you're saying goodbye to a loved one who you know is about to experience the glory of Heaven. Even if you're saying goodbye to the child for whom you've loved and cared for the last seven months, and you know she is going to a wonderful family who will love her and care for her for the rest of her life. It hurts even then.

We all knew it was coming, but it doesn't make it any easier. It looks like Halle will be leaving our home late next week. For those of you at church who've been afraid every Sunday will be your last to see her, this one will likely be it.

Speaking of church, one time on a Sunday at my old church, two foster mother friends were discussing their foster children (siblings) who had recently left their homes and moved on their adoptive home; these ladies were--understandably--crying together. A man walked by them, saw their interaction, stopped and said, "I don't know what y'all are crying about. You knew what you were getting into when you started this." Umm, thank you, dear supportive Christian brother.

I just wanted to share that . . . you know, just in case you were wondering about using that tactic to "comfort" us as we say goodbye to our precious Halle. It doesn't work so well. And it might make me mad. I would probably want to slap you if you said that to me, but I wouldn't, because you can't slap people at church. But I would come home and write about you on my blog. So it would be a better idea to just pray for us instead. And with us, for Halle and for her new family. That would help us all very much.

And just who is this new family? Well, Halle met them Wednesday. I would love to tell you all about their visit and share pictures of this first meeting between mother and daughter, but, unfortunately, Halle's case workers did not feel it was necessary for us to be there. We'll all have to settle for pictures of their second meeting, which will happen at our house TODAY! This family will actually be Halle's foster family, hopefully for just a short time. Halle's birth parents' rights have still not been terminated, so this family is going to foster her with the hope and intent of adopting her (we don't foresee any problems with that plan, but, we don't foresee a lot of things; so please pray about that part of Halle's situation as well).

Please, please pray for Halle as she makes this transition to her new home. The selfish parts of our hearts are breaking as we prepare to let her go, but at least we know it's coming and are mentally preparing ourselves for it. Halle hasn't a clue that her world is about to be turned upside down. And, unlike us, she hasn't a clue that this is a wonderful new beginning for her. Pray that Halle will make this transition smoothly and that those of us facilitating the transition will keep her best interests at heart. Pray that she will quickly form a beautiful bond with her new mother, and that she won't give us a second thought after next week.

I apologize in advance for any whining I may do about this in the near future. ;-) Many tears will be shed and some have been already, but we will be okay. We know that God has amazing plans for Halle, and we are excited to meet and get to know this family for whom we have been praying for so long.

"How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard." -Carol Sobieski and Thomas Meehan, Annie